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** ALSO IN THE NEWS **
- Citizen Special: Ask An N.R.A. Landlord
- Run Donald, Run!
- **BREAKING NEWS ** DONALD TRUMP’S HAIR-PIECE HOLDS PRESS CONFERENCE TO DISTANCE HIMSELF FROM “RACIST ENTREPRENEUR”
- In Rare Kumbaya Moment, Ousted Oklahoma Frat Boy and Girl’s Writer Lena Dunham Agree: Jews are “the Worst”
- For the fans of “How Did This Get Made?”
- DESPITE SCIENTIFIC CONSENSUS, MOST AMERICANS REFUSE TO BELIEVE TED CRUZ HAS LAUNCHED A PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN
- **DEVELOPING ** ** Apple watch’s new processor rumored to allow consumers to double the rate at which they can trade privacy for convenience **
- Citizen Week in Review: Benjamin Netanyahu Emerges to Warn of Imminent Threat of Nuclear Iran, Signaling 6 More Weeks of Winter
- **Evangelical Christian Who Believes Kingdom of Israel Must Arise To Bring About the Rapture, Forcing Jews to Choose to Between Christianity and Hell, Is Pretty Sure Democratic Senators Who Missed Netanyahu Speech Are Antisemitic **
- NATION STUNNED AS RUDY GIULIANI TRANSFORMS INTO LITERAL CARTOON OF HIMSELF ON LIVE TELEVISION
- ** DEVELOPING NEWS: Informed He is Not White, Dinesh D’souza Denounces, Kills Self**
Tag Archives: obama
CASE BROUGHT BY ESTATE OF JOSEPH STALIN STILL PENDING (MIAMI, FL) A Federal Court sitting in the Southern District of Florida today ordered Matt Drudge, The Drudge Report and the Breitbart News Group to pay the estate of Adolf Hitler … Continue reading
PROMISES GOP EVENTS WILL DWARF THE PRESIDENT’S (WASHINGTON, D.C.) With President Barack Obama’s Second Inauguration less than a week away — and over ten days filled with official celebrations fast approaching — Democrats in D.C. are buzzing with excitement about … Continue reading
With under two weeks to go in the 2012 presidential race, Republican Mitt Romney is making a surprising closing argument to America’s undecided voters. While most commentators expected Romney to reject the notion that he has shifted positions precipitously throughout … Continue reading
(Siberia, Russia) After a bruising defeat in the first major brawl of the political season, Barack Obama — the unlikely President who came out of nowhere to dethrone Hillary Clinton four years ago — is returning to first principles. Leaving … Continue reading
*Breaking Health News* In Wake of Presidential Debate, Millions of Republicans Seek Medical Help For Erections Lasting More Than Four Hours
(Washington, DC) Reports have been flooding in all over the country concerning an epidemic of priapism amongst Republican viewers of Wednesday night’s Presidential Debate. The numbers are unprecedented and doctors offices are feeling the strain. “I didn’t even know what … Continue reading