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** ALSO IN THE NEWS **
- Trump Tax Attorneys Struggle to Convince Mogul That Huge Election Loss Cannot Be “Written Off”
- Trump Tax Attorneys Struggle to Convince Mogul Huge Nov 8th Loss Cannot Be “Written Off”
- Run Donald, Run!
- **BREAKING NEWS ** DONALD TRUMP’S HAIR-PIECE HOLDS PRESS CONFERENCE TO DISTANCE HIMSELF FROM “RACIST ENTREPRENEUR”
- In Rare Kumbaya Moment, Ousted Oklahoma Frat Boy and Girl’s Writer Lena Dunham Agree: Jews are “the Worst”
- For the fans of “How Did This Get Made?”
- DESPITE SCIENTIFIC CONSENSUS, MOST AMERICANS REFUSE TO BELIEVE TED CRUZ HAS LAUNCHED A PRESIDENTIAL CAMPAIGN
- **DEVELOPING ** ** Apple watch’s new processor rumored to allow consumers to double the rate at which they can trade privacy for convenience **
- Citizen Week in Review: Benjamin Netanyahu Emerges to Warn of Imminent Threat of Nuclear Iran, Signaling 6 More Weeks of Winter
- **Evangelical Christian Who Believes Kingdom of Israel Must Arise To Bring About the Rapture, Forcing Jews to Choose to Between Christianity and Hell, Is Pretty Sure Democratic Senators Who Missed Netanyahu Speech Are Antisemitic **
- NATION STUNNED AS RUDY GIULIANI TRANSFORMS INTO LITERAL CARTOON OF HIMSELF ON LIVE TELEVISION
Tag Archives: romney
With under two weeks to go in the 2012 presidential race, Republican Mitt Romney is making a surprising closing argument to America’s undecided voters. While most commentators expected Romney to reject the notion that he has shifted positions precipitously throughout … Continue reading
It’s Deja Bush at the movies.
In celebration of President Obama’s coining the term “ROMNESIA” today, Citizen Schwartz offers a CITIZEN FLASHBACK to the Oct 9! MITTMENTO: Some Positions Are Best Forgotten
Click image to see full poster
(Siberia, Russia) After a bruising defeat in the first major brawl of the political season, Barack Obama — the unlikely President who came out of nowhere to dethrone Hillary Clinton four years ago — is returning to first principles. Leaving … Continue reading
*Breaking Health News* In Wake of Presidential Debate, Millions of Republicans Seek Medical Help For Erections Lasting More Than Four Hours
(Washington, DC) Reports have been flooding in all over the country concerning an epidemic of priapism amongst Republican viewers of Wednesday night’s Presidential Debate. The numbers are unprecedented and doctors offices are feeling the strain. “I didn’t even know what … Continue reading
(SEATTLE, WA) – Normally political commentator and activist Dan Savage does not spend a lot of time worrying about the rich and powerful. However, the soft-hearted author of Savage Love today found himself needing to send a message of hope … Continue reading